Is Complete Forgiveness Possible? Pt 2
Forgiveness is a process:
In 1990, I was a freshman in college and God had been working on me regarding some hardened areas of my heart. As I was walking down the sidewalk, it was as if God was physically walking next to me- I was overwhelmed with His goodness. Before this, I was all smiles on the outside but bitter and angry on the inside. I can remember just sitting down on the curb and saying to Him. “I am so tired of being angry and bitter! I’m ready to move on!” I can remember being so moved in that moment that I didn’t care who was around. In fact, I remember saying out loud “I am done! I am ready now to allow you to remove the hurt, pain, disappointment, and fill this void in my life. You become dad.”
Short backstory- when I was thirteen, our family broke apart- it was like an atomic bomb had been dropped right in the middle of it. One week I’m telling my brother we have the best family ever and the next week it was destroyed. None of us kids saw this coming. We were devastated! I can remember we all had a big cry the night we found out, but the next day I made a decision that I would not cry about this issue again. I didn’t realize that this would harden my heart in such a way that deeply affected my life for years. Not only did I not cry about it, but for two years I didn’t cry about anything! I locked down my emotions and I didn’t even realize what I had done. So for several years I settled into being the class clown, but yet crying and dying on the inside. It was that day in college Jesus got a hold of me. Sitting on the curb in Grand Rapids, He began to lead me in a simple prayer of forgiveness. I didn’t know that was just the beginning of a journey that would require me to walk out a process of forgiveness towards my mom and dad, which took months. Most of my bitterness did stem from my dad because he was the one who left, but my process (or journey) of forgiveness was needed for both parents.
In my previous blog you read that there are three parts of forgiveness.
1. The initial decision to forgive.
2. Releasing the person(s) of the offense- which takes time and the length of season is determined by the seriousness of the violation or offense.
3. Having compassion on the person(s)- This requires Jesus… and is an awesome miracle!
Many people think it will all be all better and over with just by saying a simple one prayer wonder. While I believe it is impossible to start the process without tapping into that initial prayer and power offered through Jesus, I now know through experience that He gives us the power to be able to complete the journey of forgiveness by transitioning into the final work of compassion with the power of ‘seventy times seven’ IN ONE DAY… and sometimes that can be everyday during the complete process of forgiveness. Sure, we want a lot of things right now and often times we aren’t willing to go through the process. But, good things do come to those who wait it out… and by waiting on God and being wiling to walk it out, I can tell you my journey of forgiving, releasing, and experiencing God’s compassion took approx 9 months. A continual walking it out has brought me to a place of true freedom! A strength, freedom and peace that for years now, I have been able to say I love my father and I love my mother and I no longer hold anything against them. I can say it with a light heart. They are released from all that I had once held them responsible for, and I have a supernatural compassionate love like I could never of had back when I was stuck in the bitterness, resentment and hurt. Now I am able to forgive much quicker… and Man, is it ever good!!!!
My encouragement to you is to stay in the process, You don’t have to live with the stuff; you can LIVE FREE!!!!
